Let’s Talk About Helping Parents Fulfill Their Role

Posted on by

Written by Dr. Kenneth Kremer

A distressing number of teens and 20-somethings have abandoned their faith. Many attended Lutheran schools and were confirmed. Their eternal future is in jeopardy. Those who become parents will likely lead future generations away from God’s grace. We know culture plays a major role in breaking down the spiritual home. But so does the church. The former promotes godless ideas (2 Timothy 4:3); the latter unintentionally enables parents to neglect their God-ordained role or fails to adequately prepare and encourage parents to fulfill that role (Romans 15:14).

The first WELS task force to examine our church’s ministry to God’s families completed its work in 1989. Two decades later the WELS hired an independent research group to learn why teens were leaving the church. Both studies raised deep concerns about the spiritual health of families. Since then, the threat has only increased. It’s time for church leaders to revisit the issue. This brief contends for a comprehensive conversation that leads to the development of a biblically sound model to train, equip, and encourage parents. A proposed framework for 14 adult conversations to train, equip, and encourage parents can be viewed HERE.

What Should We Talk About?

  • The Target: Ministry to and through the family relies on parents who are salt and light to their families (Matthew 5:13-16). In keeping with the third purpose for God’s law (guide), the changed attitudes, actions, and behaviors of transformed hearts move God’s people to reflect his love by producing fruit (John 15:16).
  • The Foundation: An Old Testament text called The Sh’ma (Deuteronomy 6:1-9) provides the biblical frame for this conversation. Sh’ma means hear-and-obey. Poised to begin a new life in the Promised Land, Moses addressed the children of Israel at God’s behest. The bones of their rebellious parents lay rotting in the desert; the young—many of them parents—survived (Numbers 14:16-23). In his opening remarks, Moses declared, “These commandments I give to you today are to be upon your hearts” (Deuteronomy 6:6). For parents, feeding their own souls was to be their highest priority.The Sh’ma became a pillar of the Jewish faith. Jesus probably recited it daily. His life and ministry mirrored the Sh’ma. His co-mission exhorted followers to “teach them to obey everything I have commanded you” (Matthew 28:18-20). Key concepts from the Sh’ma became bedrock for his Great Commission. These two great teachings have but one mission: to reach out to sinners with good news that saves.
  • The Mission: Gospel sharing occurs in two dimensions. One focuses on the church’s work of proclaiming the gospel in new places (global evangelism). The other occurs in time, as families pass the torch of faith on to succeeding generations (generational evangelism). A third dimension—change—makes God’s desired outcome possible. Repentance (a spiritual kind of change) refreshes weary hearts with the promise of his enduring forgiveness (2 Corinthians 5:17; Ezekiel 36:26). In this case, it is appropriate to call upon church leaders, as well as godly parents, to examine their hearts, repent accordingly, find peace in the good news of God’s forgiveness, and produce fruit in keeping with repentance and forgiveness (Luke 3:8).

    Verse 9 of the Sh’ma ties both kinds of evangelism together. We hear Moses telling the Israelites to post the Ten Commandments on the doorframes of their houses; adding that another identical copy of the commandments should be placed on their estates’ outer gates. The awkward duplication begs an explanation.The message attached to the dwelling’s doorframe was a visual reminder that the moral identity of this home’s inhabitants was bound to God’s Ten Commandments.For Jewish families the commandments captured the hear-and-obey essence of the Sh’ma. The identical message at the outer gates welcomed goyim—unbelievers—to enjoy this Jewish family’s hospitality. In this scenario, the two-dimensional approach to achieving our singular mission was being foreshadowed in the Sh’ma almost 1,400 years before Christ issued the commission.

And Why Is This Important?
Over the last half century, the WELS has redoubled its efforts in the area of global evangelism. God has blessed our synod’s commitment, and he continues to bless the effort. During this same 50-year period, and for a host of reasons we need to understand better, families became lethargic about practicing their faith at home. Parents led the way with an increased reluctance to carry out their God-ordained role. Many abdicated the spiritual part of their responsibilities to others. Now the biblical model of godly parenting in WELS households is a vanishing breed. God’s people have all but forgotten that from the beginning of time God calls parents to be the spiritual leaders of their own families. This is a responsibility that cannot be outsourced.

  • The Challenge: So, how will the biblical model of the godly home be restored in the WELS? If our shepherding ministry is to lead, finding a right answer to this question is an important part of our leadership role. Our first thought should be to lift one another up with God’s promises. He draws us closer to himself in a wrestling match of intense Word study, persistent prayer, and sincere soul-searching. His answer will be a blessing (Genesis 32:22-32).
  • Training and Equipping Parents: The Sh’ma provides a snapshot of a family that is living the 24/7, godly life (vss. 7-8). This family talks about Jesus frequently and freely. They pray together and disciple one another by applying law and gospel to daily life (Ephesians 4:11-13). [Four additional thoughts about developing new models to train parents are available HERE.] We look at the Sh’ma’s ideal family and wish our own families could be more like that. The proposal to train, equip, and encourage parents implies that many of them need help. They need church leaders to help them reform the spiritual life in their own homes.

A Special Thank You: For the last four years, the Northern Wisconsin District’s Commission on Family Discipleship has met monthly to develop topics related to the subject of this blog. The concepts appearing here could not have matured without their insights and thoughtful contributions.

New materials to discuss life issues in the light of Scripture with other members of the family are available at a new website that has been developed by the Northern Wisconsin District’s Commission on Family Discipleship. Go to myfamilytable.org.

Dr. Kenneth Kremer is a retired WELS teacher, editor, and author.

Please, share YOUR thoughts!