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I decided that as an opening to my midterm blog, I would share an ode to the thing that I have found myself longing for the most- my car. (Also, please note how I said ‘thing’ and not ‘person’. I feel the judgment already.) Anywho, here goes nothing…

Dearest auto
On these days of anxiety
I miss you so

Oh, how I long for your convenience
When my knees ache
After a long day

Even through your minor flaws
You always start
And you have a great stereo

Fear not, I will return home
Five quarts of oil in tow
Never to put off routine maintenance again

Ok, I admit, not my finest work, but it came from the heart. I have been pining for dear old Lafawnduh* since practically day one abroad. I miss the ease of access that her four tires and engine provide me. I was especially feeling it at 3:37 AM this fine day whilst awaiting my second bus of the morning on my way to the airport. What could have been a 40-minute drive from my apartment to the airport turned into a 2-plus-hour commute by public transport. A cheap commute, but yet another reminder of what I left behind.
On that note, I do feel very accomplished having finally gotten a handle on public transport, specifically buses. I actively avoided them for a while, preferring to utilize the train and walk anywhere after that, but I quickly realized that not everything is conveniently close to said station, most importantly, the airport. I am proud to report, however, that after a couple of missed buses and a few anxiety-filled rides, I finally feel fairly confident about using Dublin buses. I have found that my confidence in general has risen since this triumph, especially after my most recent solo trek from my apartment to Frankfurt. Yes, ma’am, I made it all in one piece, and I only forgot an adapter. Oops! But luckily the Germans are very efficient and the local technology store outfitted me with another charging cable for only £4. I can now use my laptop in both the UK and Germany, but not in the US – peak comedy for this American writer. The picture on the left is what I would consider a peaceful moment in Germany- coffee and writing my blog while looking out the window to the village below.

Ok, now that I’ve had a good laugh, I will move on. Along with gaining confidence through independence, I have also had some super fun experiences by going out of my comfort zone in order to interact with people on campus. Knowing that relationships are built on mutual respect and vulnerability, I have focused on breaking the ice with people by being semi-vulnerable from the start. The temptation to not reach out until another person reaches out first is very great, but I find that you have to ignore the feelings of pride in order to build relationships. By stepping outside of my comfort zone and approaching people, I have gained new friendships. Meeting for coffee often turns into multiple-hour conversations that span across at least two locations. My ideal friends? Chatty and ready for a laugh.

When it comes to my personal faith goals, I think that I could be doing better. I will not express all the details in length, but overall, I could always spend more time with God. I have found myself getting back into the habit of praying as I fall asleep and whilst walking from place to place. A silent stream of conscious prayer. This may not seem like a habit that is difficult to maintain, but to do so, one must think about it initially before it becomes a subconscious habit. When it comes to goals, however, I feel that the minute I put a numerical value or limit on the goal, I am less likely to have motivation to achieve that goal, so I will continue to take initiative to keep up with my faith by reaching for my Bible immediately after the thought pops into my head.

In regards to other goals, I am finding that the same is true. If I do not immediately seize the opportunity to do things, such as go for a run or go do homework in the library, I will not do them. I find some comfort in the fact that I am persistent, and I gain a lot of joy from completing tasks and looking back on a productive day. Along with that, my flatmates and I are reaching the point of real comfort; the point where being around them does not drain my social battery as much. Hanging out with them or just occupying the same areas while doing different activities does not leave me feeling tired like interacting with strangers does. We are not at the point of close friends, but I feel that their presence is more of a comfort rather than something that I have to escape from in order to decompress and go to bed. As a new goal for the second half of the semester, I will make an attempt to find a reliable place to study outside of my apartment. I will try to do all of my homework and studying, creating a separation between work and fun, and allowing my apartment to be a place of only relaxation. This plan will also force me to make it a habit to leave the house and interact with others outside of just classes. While I don’t find it difficult to approach people that I don’t know, I think that it will be good for me to have other people around to keep myself conscious on task.

I’m hoping that any of that made sense to someone. Words are very difficult sometimes, no? Side tangent, really quick (feel free to skip to the next paragraph if you’re not interested, I’m not offended…) I am currently staying with relatives in Germany who learned to speak English many years ago, but, since then, have not used it very much. I have the same problem with my German. I can understand a great portion of what they say in German, but I am not confident in my speaking ability. As a result, I tend to respond to their German in English, but I try to put my English into German word order or use words that I know are similar to German words. In spite of the broken languages or language turnstile, if you will, we have had many lengthy and lively conversations. Ok, where did that come from? I suppose the point of the story is that, regardless of whether my way of communicating is exactly the same as someone else’s, we can both be flexible in order to be understood. Ah, also, if some of this is written in a strange syntax, kindly ignore my errors and continue reading. Or you don’t have to, I’m not going to stop you. I hope you enjoy a picture that needs no language to understand- a happy cat in a window : )

Okay, Mathilde, let us get past all these side tangents. I fear I have too much creative freedom with these blogs… that being said, I also feel that I have too much creative freedom over my schooling in Ireland. While I am only taking a few classes, I find it very strange that I have only had one assignment since starting school, and it is already midterm. As I said in my last blog, it is nice to not have homework, but I have learned its value over this past semester. I need some homework, although perhaps not as much as back in the US, in order to gauge my understanding of the material. On that same note, I am also surprised at the lack of noise in Ireland. While the people speak fairly loudly, in comparison to the US, they are much quieter. My flatmates and I were in a McDonald’s a couple of weeks ago, and we found that in a full restaurant, you can barely hear the people’s conversations next to you. It honestly makes me cringe to hear other Americans because they now seem so loud to me.
Another thing that I have been happily surprised with is the lack of high fructose corn syrup in products in Ireland. While it is not illegal to use as a sweetener, it is strictly regulated. Considering the fact that corn is not as readily available in Europe as it is in the USA and the fact that people in Europe are used to eating products that are sweetened with regular sugar, HFCS is not popular**. Considering the health concerns surrounding the product, I am very happy to avoid it, and I much prefer the less sweet products, including chocolate and even soda. Although too much sugar can still cause health problems, I believe that everything should be enjoyed in moderation, so I will continue to indulge in my £.95 dark chocolate Digestives from Aldi, along with my tuna salad. Please keep your opinions to yourself unless you’d like to join me; then, take a seat, and I’ll get you a plate.

Since I started this blog longing after something I miss, I figured I would end with something that I am grateful for in Ireland and that I will miss upon my arrival home in December- cheaper groceries and ease of access to stores. Since Ireland is much smaller than the US, things are closer together and are built for a culture of short-distance travel, often on a bus, bike, or even on foot. I went from walking only from my car to wherever on campus, then to my dorm room, to walking everywhere I go from my apartment, a train, or a bus stop. I also appreciate their constant use of reusable bags at the stores. While I have to remember to bring my bags, a task unfamiliar to me, I end up having fewer bags to carry, and I don’t have a million tiny plastic bags to deal with after putting my groceries away. Along with that, haven’t seen a single plastic grocery sack hanging a tree, a somewhat regular sight in the US. They seem to consider littering almost a crime; there are even posters and ads that shame people for not putting their trash in the bins. While litter on the streets still happens, it does seem like society puts more emphasis on keeping the country clean through its actions.

During every minute of downtime this week, I have considered what to write about for this blog. As it is the midterm one, I felt that it should be a thorough overview of my feelings about the semester and details about things that I’ve learned and or noticed about myself and my surroundings. While I tried my best to put all of my thoughts together and into words, I’m sure that there are many other things that I have forgotten to write about, as I am the only one prompting myself, and I fear that I have forgotten some of the things that I told myself to write about. For example, I used to think that it was strange to drink tea with milk, but now I prefer it, and always with a biscuit on the side if possible. I cannot claim to be Irish or European, but I truly appreciate many of the aspects of their culture, and I plan to implement some of the things that I have learned into my life back in the US. I have already begun my reusable bag collection, so look out for this fashion icon ; )

Welp, I apologize for my long-winded self, but I do hope that you found this to be at the very least entertaining if not interesting. I cannot wait to see what part two of this semester has in store for me, and I should also start buying souvenirs for people back home… I’m not very good at that, but maybe if I plan ahead, I can find things that are actually useful for them. There’s nothing worse than getting a souvenir from someone else’s travels that will just sit around your house. They are what I would consider the opposite of a great conversation starter. A conversation ender.

“Oh, a (insert random knick-knack here) from (insert foreign place here)! Have you been?”

“No.”

End of conversation. Wow, there’s yet another tangent. I really should let you go before I start writing my grocery list for the week…

Peace and love!
Mathilde

 

*Yes, like from Napoleon Dynamite and duh, of course she’s a Honda 🙂
**While I have noticed the difference in taste, I did have to do some more research about the regulations around HFCS, so here is the website that I used: HFCS