Home Away From Home
Having a host family in Germany was something that before I arrived made me both very excited and nervous. Would they like me? Would I like them? Would they be friendly? Would they want to spend time with me?
However, after spending a little over a month with them so far, I can happily say that having a host family was one of the best decisions of my study abroad experience. As soon as I arrived I was greeted by my host mother, who gave me a hug and welcomed me into her home. Soon enough, I found myself settling in and spending time with them at meals and when I was at their house.
Their flat/apartment is in a well kept building about 25 minutes from the city center by train. I often enjoy taking that train to the city center and walking around, not to a specific place but just because I can. I still find it hard to believe when I round the corner coming out of the underground train station and see the Brandenburg Gate right there in front of me. At my host family’s house, I also have my own room and bathroom which is really nice. Pictured above is my room. Having that space to myself has been really awesome, and is something that I definitely would not have gotten if I had done a dorm type living arrangement.
Another thing that I think is awesome is breakfast and dinner. Both of those are covered by my host family, and not having that extra stress of having to find meals has been very useful and beneficial. (And they make really good food too!)
On a somewhat related note, something I’ve taken away from these experiences, especially around meals, is the way they have dinner. Having that time and really intentionally slowing down has been really nice for me. My host family makes a big point to be present in the moment during these times and everyone genuinely shares how their day was. At first, I was nervous for when I’d have to share my day (partially because I’d be saying it in German) but they those moments have quickly become some of my favorite and are a great way to practice my German in what is a very safe space.
Overall, I really enjoy my living arrangements and host family. There are many aspects of their life that I admire. Dinner has quickly become a highlight of my day because I get to sit and talk with my host family. It’s really nice that they are very invested in how my day was and are willing to help me with any questions I have. Having that family feel is another thing I really appreciate.
I have a host brother (18) and a host sister (22) who are both close in age to me, so talking with them feels very natural and I have really enjoyed getting to know them. I hope to continue spending time with them and getting to know them.
The Ins and Outs Of Living With a Host Family
Here in Berlin, I live in what is called a guest or host family. That basically means I’ve chosen to live with a German family instead of staying in the student dorms. Before coming here, we had to write an essay about ourselves, and based on that, the program directors decided which family would be the best match. To be honest, I had been hoping for a family with kids or maybe a pet, but instead, I ended up with a lovely couple in their 50s. And honestly, even though it wasn’t what I pictured at first, it’s still been a good experience.
Living with a host family is so different from staying in the dorms. I knew that the dorm options here would be full of other American exchange students, which is a great opportunity to make friends, but I was hoping for a more authentic experience. A big reason why I came here was to expand my horizons, and I knew that if I lived with other Americans, it would be way too easy to just stick with them and not step into the German Culture. By living with a German family, I’ve been able to experience the culture on a much deeper level. I’ve gotten to try traditional German foods, watch how daily life flows here, and practice speaking German outside of the classroom. That said, it does make things harder when it comes to making friends within my program. Since I don’t live with them or even really near them, I miss out on some of the casual hangouts or late night bonding that happens in the dorms. Sometimes it feels like I’m missing a piece of the social experience.
But at the same time, I wouldn’t trade it. The couple I live with are very kind, and they’ve welcomed me into their home. Much like the rest of Germany, they’re very structured people, the type who like things neat and orderly, which was a little frustrating at first because I didn’t know what the right way to do things was. But as time has gone on, I’ve started to feel more comfortable and even more at home.
My home is in Schlachtensee, a suburb on the edge of Berlin, and it’s absolutely beautiful. I don’t live in the hustle and bustle of central Berlin, which sometimes makes me feel like I’m a bit removed, but it also has its perks. Right near my house, there’s this gorgeous lake where I can walk around or go swimming when the weather is nice. The picture I have here is the restaurant, The Big Pan. I live on the top floor of the apartments in the building behind the restaurant. It is a tiny apartment, but it’s decorated so adorably. I even have my own room, which is nice and cozy.
Another plus of living with a host family is that they feed you breakfast and dinner. And it’s good food at that! The dorm option here leaves you responsible for all your meals. And, your host family’s got your back on the small stuff. One day, it was raining, and my host mom offered me an umbrella. It’s the little things that are making this a much more personable experience than the dorms would have been.
The only downside is the commute. I live about 50 minutes away from school. Every morning, I walk to the station and hop on the S1 train. That ride takes around 15 minutes, and then I transfer to a bus for the rest of the trip. At first, I really dreaded the idea of spending that much time commuting every day. But now, I’ve grown to enjoy it. Germans don’t really talk much on public transportation, which is so different from America, but I quite like the silence. I’ll use that time to relax, wind down, reflect on my day, sometimes I journal, and I’ve even read a few books!
So even though I might miss out on some of the dorm life experiences, I feel like I’ve gained something equally valuable. Living with a host family had given me a deeper look into the culture and pushed me out of the bubble I might have stayed in otherwise. I’ve learned to make a few German dishes, gone to some neighborhood events, and found a new home on the other side of the world.
Living in Berlin
Dear readers at home, Now that I have been in Berlin for just over a month it is a good time to tell you how and where I am living. I live in a part of Berlin called Schöneberg. Right down the street from where JFK gave his famous speech, where he said “Ich bin ein Berliner.” Super cool history in Berlin is all over and it’s even cooler when it’s just down the street.
I live around 30-50 minutes from where I go to school. I have many different ways I can go to school like with the S-Bahn or a bus or even a bike. Usually the trains run on time but sometimes they are a little behind, but even then I can make it to school on time by going a different way. Transport is awesome in Berlin and I have a super easy time getting into the middle of the city, too.
The apartment I live in is in an old apartment building. The stairs creak when you walk up, but it really adds to the experience of living there. The actual apartment I live in with my host family is nice a big. My room has big windows and there are even beautiful stained glass windows inside on the doors. The sun does most of the work to provide light inside and it is very beautiful when the sun shines in. There is a kitchen and a balcony and a few other rooms in total.
With me in the apartment lives my host family. Elvira and Attila are the people who are hosting me. Elvira is always home and makes me breakfast and dinner most days. I usually try to speak with her in German during meals and sometimes she shows me the German newspaper. Attila is often gone during the week for work, but every once in a while he is home and cooks dinner.
This living arrangement is very different to MLC. First off at MLC school is a 5 minute walk not a 30-50 minute train trip. On top of that, at MLC I live with my fellow students but here I live with a couple who cooks me food. Which is another difference that I don’t have the caf to go to whenever I want but instead I have more strict meal times. The biggest difference between living in the dorms at MLC and the apartment I live in here in Berlin is that my host family has a cat. Her name is Tabby and she is super shy but if I’m lucky she will come up to me for a pet. And at MLC in the dorms cats are not allowed so it is quite different having one.
All in all living in Berlin is great. Honestly, I don’t mind the longer commute especially because school doesn’t start till 9. And my host family is super nice and good cooks plus they have a cat. 
S-Bahn Station platform
First Impressions of the Land of 10,000 Sheep
This week has put me through a whirlwind of emotions. If you are reading this blog for all sunshine and rainbows, I’m afraid you’re in the wrong place. Life is certainly not wonderful all the time, even when you’re jumping into a semester of your dreams. I’ll be completely honest. I’ve felt more uncomfortable this week than I can remember feeling in years. I know that I am doing this in order to push myself beyond my limits, but I would be lying if I told you that this week has not made me question how much I can take. Of course, I am getting ahead of myself. Let’s have a quick recap.
Firstly, the airport in general. I can be quoted as saying that I enjoy flying and airports are entertaining, but I fear I may go back on my word after my most recent adventures. From flying into one airport in New York City and having to find a way to get to the other and board my plane to getting the middle seat of the middle row on the sleepless flight to Dublin, I can confidently say that I no longer look forward to flights. Alas, I survived and even made it through the 30-plus-hour day that resulted.
I think the hardest thing this week has been having nothing familiar to rely on for comfort. I’m forced to find familiarity with my flatmates and the places on campus that I’ve visited a handful of times. Besides that, everything that happens seems to add to my stress. Class schedule not working out, jumping through multiple hoops just for my emails to be left unanswered, my computer deciding to break the day before classes start, traveling to Dublin alone to buy a new computer, and feeling that I’m in the wrong place or that I should be participating in some activity. It’s been a struggle to find the joy in the stressful situations, but I’ve been pushing myself to focus on the future and keep my chin up through it all. I cannot truly control anything, so I have to remember that even in the loneliness and feelings of helplessness, I can always look to Jesus, the one who is always there for me and truly understands everything that I’m dealing with this week.
Anywho, on that note, I went to Catholic mass this week, which was very interesting. I went out of curiosity, hoping to find comfort from the word of God, but instead I found myself even more uncomfortable. The service was riddled with traditions and things that people do, but there aren’t explicit instructions on what to do. I struggled to find God’s love in the rigid structure and confusing liturgy. It felt like a scavenger hunt, but the instructions are in a whole different, unfamiliar language, and there is no one else there to show you where to start. As much as I find peace in the regularity and consistency of some traditions in church services, by attending this service, I gained the perspective of an outsider, and I can see how our services may seem daunting to those attending for the first time. I also realized how alone I am in my faith here. It will be difficult to keep myself accountable for staying in the word, but I find that it is the only thing that I can cling to for comfort.
I’m fully aware that this blog has been very negative so far, but I just needed to get those feelings on the table right away. Now that we’ve been through that turmoil, we can talk about the wonderful world of Ireland. Firstly, the people are so nice and willing to help with whatever you need. They are interested in getting to know you and are particularly interested in comparing the US with Ireland. I recently went on a walking tour of Dublin, and the guide was a perfect example of all of the people that I’ve met so far. The best way to describe her was cheery- full of laughs and a desire to show us her city. She put an emphasis on having human connections and going out of one’s way to talk to people in order to break away from a technologically advanced yet socially inept society. This week, I’ve been working on taking her advice by going out of my comfort zone and chatting with people that I run into, rather than just allowing silence to fill the air. My goal is to leave the interaction with a new friend rather than just a familiar face.
Along with the people, the weather is so beautiful- a mild range of 50-65 degrees with occasional sunshine, with scattered showers almost guaranteed every day. It’s in between the weather that you can never fully prepare yourself for, and I love it. It’s normal to carry around a tote bag here, so if I get uncomfortable with a jacket on, I can just take it off and put it in my bag. It’s truly a perfect system. It’s perfect fall weather minus the fact that the leaves are not crunchy due to the damp climate, a fact that I sadly found out after attempting a leaf stomp the other day. It was a heartbreaking realization made worse by the number of people who watched my failure… Oh well, we live and we learn.
While I have felt fairly uncomfortable for the majority of this past week, my flatmates have been a light in the loneliness. Since we are all in the same boat of not knowing anyone and having to figure out living in Ireland on our own, we have quickly teamed up, and I can already feel our connection growing. While we are all very different and are from all across the US, they are becoming the people that I rely on for comfort and familiarity. I find myself spending more and more time in the common spaces where the number of awkward silences is swiftly being overtaken by the number of laughs. I have people to explore Maynooth with and even Dublin if we are feeling up for an adventure.
Phew, I think that’s all I’ve got so far. For those of you who made it through the whole thing, I really appreciate you. It has already been a journey, and I’ve only been in Ireland for a week. As the whirlwind inevitably continues this semester, I look forward to getting more and more comfortable with my new environment and growing in my independence. Oh, I almost forgot, the picture for this month is of me next to the castle that is literally on my campus…?!?! Also, notice how green it is??? Europe is so cool. Ok, I promise, I’m actually done now.
All the love!
Mathilde
Wait… This is Actually Happening?!?!
These past few weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot about my study abroad journey up to this point. From seeing presentations about studying abroad, to deciding to work towards doing it, to planning the last-minute details. I know that it may sound corny, but I genuinely cannot believe that I will be flying out of the US in two days. On the one hand, I’m super excited. This is something that I’ve been dreaming of for years now. A solo adventure to a country I’ve never been to in order to push myself out of my comfort zone. On the other hand, I’m going on a SOLO adventure which is completely out of my comfort zone… More on that later.
Anywho, in preparation for this new adventure, I’ve been getting to know myself. Asking myself hard questions that challenge my preexisting beliefs and subconscious reactions to others. At first, the idea of getting to know myself better seemed strange, but it has made me more self-aware and has taught me empathy by allowing me to see the world through other people’s perspectives. I expect the program to help me become more open to interacting with people whom I don’t necessarily know or with whom I don’t have any obvious commonalities. It may be tough to conceptualize as I am writing this from the comfort of my bed in Iowa, but I am intrigued to discover what the next few months have in store for me.
Through this process, I’ve been able to narrow down some of the strengths and weaknesses in order to make some personal goals for this adventure. I expect to increase my personal discipline by relaxing and allowing myself to prioritize things that help my emotional and physical health, rather than always focusing on deadlines and things that cause me stress. While the beginning of this adventure may be causing me a lot of stress right now as I fret about how many pairs of socks to pack or whether or not to bring my pillow, I know that, overall, this experience will force me to become comfortable with unfamiliarity. I will have to learn to prioritize things that matter and spend less time on the things that are ultimately unimportant.
Along with developing proper priorities, I also hope to work on discipline and self-regulation. Over the years, I’ve been surrounded by a Christian community that cares about my faith life and has lived on a schedule that regularly includes time to be in the Word. Now that I will be around people whom I don’t know and in a new place, I will have to keep myself accountable in my personal devotional life and scheduling and prioritizing my connections with fellow believers. I will have to make a point of setting aside time to spend in the Bible and reaching out to others to find people who share the faith. This experience will test my faith and force me to put genuine effort into my personal faith. I hope to achieve a stronger faith in God through my intentional time spent in the Word and reliance on God to get me through new and often stressful situations abroad.
OK, finally coming back to the fact that I’m going on my first solo trip EVER to a whole new country. Of course, when I started planning this experience, the prospect of going alone sounded great. A complete reset. I love all my friends and family, and the Midwest will always be my home, but I need a little change of pace. I love travelling, and I know that every time I put myself into a situation that I’m new to or not completely comfortable in, I flourish. Not that I disagree with the reasoning of my past self, but now it’s getting to feel real. I know that it will all be ok and everything will work out, even if it doesn’t go just as I planned. I don’t know if the pre-departure nerves will ever lessen, but I am confident that this experience will help me achieve my goal of more self-confidence, especially when it comes to entering new situations and interacting with new people.
For all two of you who are wondering, I chose this picture because I feel like it encapsulates the feeling of excitement I have as I metaphorically run towards the future. Plus, I love my sisters and I will miss them desperately, even if they do frustrate me once in a while… That being said, I will spend the next 48 hours stressing as I finally start finish packing and hoping that I remember all of the important documents that I need. I digress. Don’t worry, I’ll keep you updated every step of the way : )
All the love,
Mathilde